I am so tired of having to pee in a cup when having a procedure. It is very annoying to keep saying over and over "if it's for a pregnancy test, I DON'T HAVE A UTERUS!" What's the point of filling out patient paperwork over and over and over again if no one reads it?
I am also tired of having pain dismissed. I had a terrible experience with a colonoscopy a few years ago where my IV failed and I was awake, sentient, and fully aware of what was going on. I said "OW!" and "I'M AWAKE!" and no one listened. I was left with a longer than usual recovery/ I had to take two additional days off due to horrid cramping and pain, and the place I'll never return to said, "It's always a possibility you'll need additional time after," which was infuriating because that was NEVER mentioned to me.
I can't tell you how many times I have been at a doctor's office, particularly related to lady bits, and been told "you'll feel some discomfort." THAT IS A BALDFACED LIE. "Discomfort" almost always means "pain." If you've never listened to the Serial Productions podcast "The Retrievals," or the follow up one about people who FELT their C-sections and were told they didn't, those are great and terrible examples of how women aren't listened to when it comes to pain. (Full disclosure, I listened to "The Retrievals" but couldn't bring myself to listen to the one about C-sections.)
So, when I had my colonoscopy on Wednesday to see why I had such a scary experience in January, I was super duper vocal that I wanted to be sure I was knocked out. That my previous procedure was the stuff of butt nightmares.
Two things happened:
1) The nurse asked if there was any chance I could be pregnant, and when I said NO somewhat forcefully, she asked if I'd had a hysterectomy and when I said "YES!" with an inordinate amount of glee, she laughed. I do not at all regret my hysterectomy. Good riddance, no downsides (for me, anyway).
2) When the anesthesiologist came over to talk with me, the same nurse said, "FYI, she had a bad experience last time and she wants to make sure she'll be out out." OMG, listened to AND affirmed! The anesthesiologist was delightful and assured me, "oh yes. You will not feel or remember a thing." He also didn't give me a hard time when I continued asking "are you sure I'll be out?" all the way up until I conked out, delightfully conscious-less for the whole thing.
What a relief. The colonoscopy went well (they think it was a horrid bacterial infection that caused the initial episode) and I have been firmly un-traumatized. I also didn't have to pee in a cup. Wins all around!
PS - If you go to get a colonoscopy, I highly recommend that you go somewhere that has an actual anesthesiologist. It wasn't general, it was sedation, but anesthesiologists know what they're doing and are absolute angels.